Now I know that rose trees never grow in New York City

I'm starting to think I'm going to end up in a big city.
I've lived in a small town for the majority of my life, and I've never really felt like it suited me.
I like to always be able to leave my house and have something to do.
A wide variety of people, and a little something for everybody sounds so appealing.

The only really large cities I've been to are Los Angeles and London.
I pretty much loved both, and I think it's ashamed that I haven't seen New York yet because I feel like I would love it.

I would like to live in a really big place at least once in my life.
I feel like it would be years before I was bored again.

Clouds Up

One thing I'm figuring out more as I'm getting older, is that happiness is a choice.
I can't wait for my preferred circumstances.

I used to blame my unhappiness and years of depression on everything around me.
I was living under "the bell jar" for years. In case you haven't been under the bell jar before... I will just say it isn't easy to breathe under there.

It's up to me to break the glass and crawl out.
I don't go around looking for a boyfriend, and new dress, a piece of cake, or a bottle of pills to get me out of it.
None of those things work because I've tried them all.

I pull myself out of the bell jar with determination and the grace of God.

I choose to focus on things that make me happy and just BE happy.

Lipstick, coffee, singing, drumming, baking biscuits, coloring my hair red, Seinfeld re-runs, my dog Toby, wearing cowboy boots, talking to my chick friends, listening to the Beatles, watching Freaks and Geeks, reading a book, driving through the country.

These are the things I do now to make myself happy.

My grandmother lived to be in her 90's and I will always credit her longevity to her good attitude.
That's what I aspire towards.

(last photo from JaneAsherPhotoblog/blog title from "Clouds up"-Air)